How to Make Divorce Easier on Your Children – 770-609-1247 | Georgia Divorce Family Lawyers
There has been a lot of research detailing the effects of divorce on kids: lower self-esteem, worse academic performance, behavioral issues, etc. are all attributed to divorce. The reality is that while all of these things could certainly be the result of your divorce, divorce need not change your childs sense of security or personality. Dont guilt yourself into thinking you have ruined your childs life. Do, however, make sure you have done your due diligence in ensuring the marriage cannot be saved by reconciling differences. If staying married will cause your family more stress than getting a divorce, then the latter option will probably be for the best.
The following are some tips on how to make the divorce process easier on your child(ren):
Make sure they know they are not to blame Children often feel as though they are somehow to blame for the split up of their parents. While this may not be readily apparent to the parents, it is nevertheless a wise idea to assure your children that the divorce has nothing to do with anything they did or said.
Make sure they know their lives will not change drastically Your children should feel as though as many things stayed constant as possible. Although the obvious has changed, make every effort to keep the family home and have them live there, or visit often. Keep them in the same school and dont move right away. One stress at a time can minimize the negative impact on their lives.
Dont talk negatively about your spouse No matter what, that is still their mother/father. If they feel hostility it can worsen the situation. And reflect poorly on your parenting skills in court.
Give them enough time and attention to balance out the change Often, the most damaging effects occur not because of the divorce itself, but because the parents are so wrapped up in it, they forget about the kids. Sitting down to talk to them about it and what it means is taken for granted but can make a world of difference in their level of acceptance. Especially if mom and dad can be there to explain what is happening and reassure them that everything is going to be alright. Dont forget to help with homework, and emphasize (and incentivize) the importance of good grades. Keep life similar to what it was prior to the divorce chores should still be there, but so should fun activities that will allow sufficient opportunity for stress relief.
Encourage your child to seek help Feelings of embarrassment or shame can often lead kids to suffer in silence. Make sure you make it clear you and your spouse are there for them. Encourage them to talk to peer groups, school counselors, or seek professional help to get them through this.’
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